Ring Tone
by Vani Jane
Summary: It was Arthur's birthday but he had a meeting to attend. Alfred doesn't like it and made sure Arthur didn't get any sleep but that's not all he did, he had to mess with the cellular, too.


**Author's Note: **Extremely late birthday-fic for Arthur! And the fifth out of ten fics I've uploaded in one night! O_O A TFLN-inspired fanfic to boot. And this features the Kirkland siblings, including Ireland. The brothers (Scotland, Wales and N. Ireland) aren't as mean as they should be to Arthur, I guess. But they do enjoy teasing Arthur, that's for sure (who doesn't?). Oh and I'm not so sure about how Ireland acts, so she's quite a bit randomly blunt here – I imagined her to be quite a bit of a tomboy with her having four brothers to grow up with but she still has a bit of a feminine side to her, mostly when not in the company of friends. **Please continue on reading to the story! And please don't forget to leave a review or a critique but no flames please!**

**Pairing(s): **AmericaxEngland / AlfredxArthur

**Genre(s): **Humour

**Warning(s): **Sexual Themes, Shounen-Ai, Yaoi, Human Names, Original Characters (*)

**Disclaimer: **This is a work of fiction by a fan for fans. This has no relation to the real countries and its people. Hetalia Axis Powers rightfully belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya.

_*Lachlan (Scotland), Bran (Wales), Cian (N. Ireland) and Enye (Ireland) are _sort of _original characters since these countries haven't yet appeared in the manga or anime._

"**Ring Tone"**

"What?" Alfred pouted, "They can't be serious!"

Arthur sighed, he had already foreseen this kind of reaction from the American and he couldn't blame the boy. After all, he himself wanted to spend the special day in the company of Alfred.

"It can't be helped," Arthur said with a forced smile. "The nation must come first always."

Alfred crossed his arms on his chest and quietly hissed, "But you _are _England."

That was true and his boss knew that fact, too. Which was why sometimes, they thought of him more as a country rather than human. Technically speaking, he wasn't human but he had emotions like a human did. Having a meeting on his birthday was quite painful to Arthur, he didn't even want to have a grand celebration – all he wanted was a day off from work but alas, he couldn't even get that one wish.

"We'll just have to make the most of the time we have." Arthur said softly with a light blush making its place on his pale cheeks. "It was kind of the Prime Minister to have given me the day off today."

"He should've given you two days." Alfred muttered.

"Even two days off for you is quite long. Did you force Matthew to pretend he was you – again?" Arthur asked, trying to change the conversation.

Alfred looked away, guilty of being found out. "It wasn't as if he minded. Besides, he gets to play around all day in the White House and all."

"You do realize that you're giving me more work to do, right?" Arthur shook his head lightly.

"The Prime Minister won't even know he's gone." Alfred answered stubbornly and when Arthur gave him a nagging look, the America shrugged. "Hey, you know it's true!"

Arthur sighed, letting the whole thing slide. He made a mental note of giving Matthew a call to apologise and thank the good lad for putting up with Alfred. Without Matthew's superb acting, it would've been near impossible for Alfred to come over as much as he did to England.

"I know it's not much," Arthur began, he really didn't want to attend the meeting but he had no choice. "But if the meeting finishes quickly tomorrow, we can spend the rest of the day together."

"No, it's all right." Alfred said, feeling bad for making the night turn sour. "You've got work to do, I'm cool with that. I'm due to leave the day after tomorrow, so it shouldn't be that bad. As you said, we'll make the most of tonight and tomorrow night."

Arthur gulped at the way Alfred spoke and looked at him – thank the angels of heaven that they were dining in a private room!

"Y-You git..." Arthur blushed.

"We're not sleeping tonight, babe." Alfred promised – though, it sounded more of a threat to Arthur. And boy, he couldn't wait to get home and to _not _get some sleep with Alfred.

The following morning, after eating Arthur's home cooked breakfast, the Briton was off to the office leaving Alfred to puke his guts out and finding a place to eat a proper meal, one where the food actually looked edible.

Arthur strolled into the meeting room ten minutes before the actually meeting would start. He was quite surprised to see his brothers and sister all present in the meeting room. It was one thing where they were all present and another thing where they all arrived before he did – it was a real shock to him.

"Happy birthday, Arthur!" Enye greeted with a grin, it had been a while since she last saw her brother and despite the rough history they had, she and Arthur were the same as always.

"Thank you, Enye." Arthur smiled at his sister, "If I had known you'd be showing up, I would have come a bit sooner."

"A bit late today, aren't ye?" Lachlan teased with a matching smirk, he wasn't much of a bully to Arthur now at least when compared to some centuries ago but he still enjoyed teasing his little brother from time to time. "Had a long night? Are those bags under yer eyes?"

Arthur shot a frown at Lachlan while Cian and Bran were chuckling on their seats, knowing quite well of their younger brother's personal life.

"Something caught me up." Arthur answered vaguely and walked to his seat.

"Oh, I bet it was a rough night." Lachlan snickered and went over to pat Arthur on the shoulder. "Teasing aside, Artie, happy birthday! I do hope you didn't expect us to get you a cake or anything – the man wouldn't hear of it being brought in, so we left it out with Peter."

"Thank you." Arthur said, feeling a bit embarrassed when his brothers crowded over him. They were all taller than he was and it made him feel quite small when he stood by them.

"Still our adorable baby brother as ever!" Bran said, wrapping his arms tightly around the younger Kirkland in a bear hug. "You really took after me!"

Cian snorted at Bran's remark. "Happy birthday, Artie. Peter's preparing the next room for later since he's not part of the meeting. You can even call that yankee over for lunch."

"And tell him we bought the food." Lachlan added, "He might turn down the invitation if he thinks you cooked the food."

Arthur shot Lachlan a glare while his siblings chuckled. "As if any of you can cook better than I can!"

Once the chuckling had died down, Enye looked to her twin, "Wait a moment, you never told me that Arthur had found someone! And a yank for that matter!"

Just as Cian was about to go into a deep explanation, their bosses stepped in the room forcing them back to their seats. Luckily, Arthur was able to send Alfred a text message about lunch before the meeting actually started.

Thirty boring minutes into the meeting, Lachlan was keeping himself awake by remembering the countless battles he'd fought in while Bran was was doodling sheep on his notes; Cian was tapping his fingers on his knee to the rhythm of the song he was playing in his head; beside him was Enye, who was playing with the faeries using her pen and a few seats away was Arthur, who was nearly about to fall asleep.

Silence filled the room as the current speaker was changing his slides. Each of the Kirkland siblings took a quick glance at the clock, lunch was still far, far away. They eyed each other, knowing that they all would have rather been anywhere but here.

Arthur shrugged when Enye looked at him with desperately bored eyes, even the fairies weren't that much entertaining for her now. It was a sad thing that Flying Mint Bunny was on vacation at the Caribbean with Captain Hook and Tinkerbell.

Two minutes ticked by and it felt like hours, Arthur could no longer suppress the yawn and was forced to open his mouth wide for it come out.

_Shit, I'm about to- oh, Alfred! Hnnggg... Mmm... One-One more, keep going, Alfred..._

Arthur stiffened, his eyes wide as Tony's space ship. Everyone including Enye's fairies looked at him with eyes just as huge in confusion and shock. Holy mother-

_Shit, I'm about to- oh, Alfred! Hnnggg... Mmm... One-_

Arthur realized it came from his cell phone and had quickly silenced it but the damage had been dealt. His face was as red as the roses that covered Francis' vital regions and the awkward silence that filled the room wasn't helping him.

"Oh. My. God. Arthur." Enye was the first to speak and after her, Lachlan broke into a roar of laughter followed by Cian and Bran.

The look of pure shock that Enye wore, the mocking laughs from his brothers and the nagging looks the bosses shot at Arthur made him want to shrink and bury himself in a hole, a deep dark abysmal hole.

Dear Lord, even the fairies were giggling and rolling in the air at Arthur.

One of the bosses cleared his throat to get everyone back to the meeting, he had to do it thrice since Lachlan wouldn't stop. He was certainly going to talk this over with Arthur but for now, he decided it was best to let it slide. He dared not invade into the personal life of Arthur – based from what the journals left from the past leaders about Arthur, he just didn't want to know more.

The meeting proceeded on, but Arthur couldn't concentrate. It was too awkward staying in the room with Lachlan and Bran wearing huge mirroring grins and Enye badgering Cian for an explanation.

"I'll explain later, it's a long story." Cian whispered to his twin.

"All right, but just one thing, brother," Enye whispered back, "Alfred is short for Alfreda, right?"

"No, it's short for the United States of America."

Alfred was a dead man for changing his ring tone.

The moment Arthur laid his green eyes on Alfred during lunch, he punched the American square on the face.

"I swear to the Queen, if you ever pull something like that ever again, I swear, I will castrate you!"

Instead of feeling scared, Alfred broke to huge-assed grin, knowing what just happened. "So, I take it you heard my present."

"Present my arse, you bloody git!" Arthur exclaimed, red-faced from the embarrassment.

"Calm yer head down, Artie." Lachlan snickered as he entered the room, "It's just us bros – and Enye. Nothing to be too embarrassed about."

"Belt up!" Arthur spat.

Enye looked at Alfred and held out her hand, "Pleasure to finally meet you in person, Mr. Jones. We've never really been formally introduced or got to talking."

"Yo. Just call me Alfred." Alfred grinned, shaking hands with the girl. "Um..."

"I'm Enye – Ireland. Arthur's only sister and Cian's twin." Enye answered, "I've heard about you from Cian – and now that I've got a good look at you, it's no wonder Arthur was begging for more."

"Thanks! Um... I guess." Alfred scratched the back of his head, feeling kind of embarrassed that Arthur's siblings – except Peter – heard the recorded ring tone but oh, well... he enjoyed teasing Arthur more than anything else except sleeping with the man.

"It's just too much fun to tease Artie, ain't I right?" Lachlan said as he gave Alfred a high five and Alfred agreed with a hearty chuckle.

"He has the most adorable reactions." Enye agreed while Bran and Cian were pinching Arthur's cheeks in the background, trying to piss him off even further. "Though, I never took him to still be as energetic as he was before since he's always sewing at home. And I bet he's got quite the energy since he's not walking funny, you two must have rutted each other quite a lot for his arse to be used to it."

Alfred flushed as did Arthur while the brothers broke into another round of laughter. Thank heavens, Peter was out getting ice – Enye was just too blunt at times.

"Enye, m'dear lass, you have to visit more often!"

**The End**

**Author's Note: **I realized that I didn't explain how the characters looked. OTL Urgh, but I don't think I'm quite good at explaining how characters looked. So, for now, I'll leave it to your imagination – some day I might post it up on my profile or write a fanfic about (my version of) the Kirkland family.

The entry from TFLN that inspired me to write this:

_(334): View more from Alabama_

_He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning._

**America: **Yo, dude, now didn't I just come up with an awesome birthday gift?

**Me: **You got the fangirls (and boys) entertained, so I'd say that's pretty awesome. You deserve ice cream, dude.

**America: **OwO I~c~e~c~r~e~a~m~!

**Me: **So, hit that review button, my dear fangirls and boys! **For one review is one spoon of ice-cream for the awesomely hungry hero!**

**America: **WTF. ONE SPOON?

**Me: **Thank you and good day to all!


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